My Tryst With Destiny
"Congratulations- Welcome to the Teresian family.Classes will begin on the sixth".Suddenly,like a thunderbolt,the truth struck me! I could never,ever become what I had dreamt of since the day mamma huddled me close to her chest and whispered in to my ear,"You are going to become a great doctor".Sorrow like a sharp edged sword plunged into my heart- I cried!!
My fate had long been sealed with the announcement of the Kerala CET results.But,I hung on! I had written scores of others tests.Surely,something would come up.Something did come - in plenty........Rejections!! I have heard people say that the saddest word that can ever be said is "good-bye".Well,for me "not qualified" were the most disheartening words.After each result was announced,I would burn the hall tickets of the test in the privacy of my dark bedroom.Even the bluish -yellow flames that arose seemed to be mocking me.The blast ash that remained, I would blow out of the little window through which I had often gazed into the deep blue skies smiling at the thought of being addressed as "doctor".The black ash would flutter in the gentle breeze like a swarm of bees before I lost sight of them.Then, oneday I had no more hall tickets to burn! But I was not a person who would give up so easily.I waited and waited in vain for the phone call that never came,the postman who never turned up.Meanwhile,Sunu and Lubin had got admission in Kottayam Medical College.We were the three musketeers."Is there some book called the 'two musketeers' " I joked to hide the rivulet of tears running dowm my cheeks "My Lord, my Lord,why have you forsaken me" , my heart cried out as we parted ways.
On the sixth of July, i entered the portals St.Teresa's. The same white building, the same flight of stairs, everthing, resembled the college I used to visualize in my dreams except that instead of Kottayam Medical College,it was St.Teresa's College,Eranakulam.As I was climbing the steps to my classroom I came across an open Bible.My heart skipped a beat as I read Jeremiah 29:11."I alone know the plans I have for you.Plans for your prosperity, not disaster".A sudden clamness engulfed me- I felt peaceful for the first time in many months.The college had meanwhile arranged an orientation course for the first year degree students.The three days of prayer and workship, lifted me to the pinnacle of spiritual bliss.On the last day we were asked to write on paper,stuff we wished to erase from memory and then to cast the paper into the fire.I wrote,"My dream to become a doctor".As I burnt the bit,the yellow flames no longer seemed to mock me.They seemed to be dancing .....dancing to the song that arose from the depth of my heart.
The last one year was a horrific ordeal for me.But as the saying goes,"Every dark cloud has a silver lining".For me,St.Teresa's was the silver lining.I have regained the lost rhythm of my life and risen from the ashes of shame and defeat.Indeed,I have finally attained my Canaan of freedom!
To be or not to be:that is the quest:Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune Or,to take arms against a sea of trouble And by opposing end them?
Shakespeare's 'As you like it'
NB:I prefer the latter! I intend to be!
By:- Shalom Mary Thomas
"Congratulations- Welcome to the Teresian family.Classes will begin on the sixth".Suddenly,like a thunderbolt,the truth struck me! I could never,ever become what I had dreamt of since the day mamma huddled me close to her chest and whispered in to my ear,"You are going to become a great doctor".Sorrow like a sharp edged sword plunged into my heart- I cried!!
My fate had long been sealed with the announcement of the Kerala CET results.But,I hung on! I had written scores of others tests.Surely,something would come up.Something did come - in plenty........Rejections!! I have heard people say that the saddest word that can ever be said is "good-bye".Well,for me "not qualified" were the most disheartening words.After each result was announced,I would burn the hall tickets of the test in the privacy of my dark bedroom.Even the bluish -yellow flames that arose seemed to be mocking me.The blast ash that remained, I would blow out of the little window through which I had often gazed into the deep blue skies smiling at the thought of being addressed as "doctor".The black ash would flutter in the gentle breeze like a swarm of bees before I lost sight of them.Then, oneday I had no more hall tickets to burn! But I was not a person who would give up so easily.I waited and waited in vain for the phone call that never came,the postman who never turned up.Meanwhile,Sunu and Lubin had got admission in Kottayam Medical College.We were the three musketeers."Is there some book called the 'two musketeers' " I joked to hide the rivulet of tears running dowm my cheeks "My Lord, my Lord,why have you forsaken me" , my heart cried out as we parted ways.
On the sixth of July, i entered the portals St.Teresa's. The same white building, the same flight of stairs, everthing, resembled the college I used to visualize in my dreams except that instead of Kottayam Medical College,it was St.Teresa's College,Eranakulam.As I was climbing the steps to my classroom I came across an open Bible.My heart skipped a beat as I read Jeremiah 29:11."I alone know the plans I have for you.Plans for your prosperity, not disaster".A sudden clamness engulfed me- I felt peaceful for the first time in many months.The college had meanwhile arranged an orientation course for the first year degree students.The three days of prayer and workship, lifted me to the pinnacle of spiritual bliss.On the last day we were asked to write on paper,stuff we wished to erase from memory and then to cast the paper into the fire.I wrote,"My dream to become a doctor".As I burnt the bit,the yellow flames no longer seemed to mock me.They seemed to be dancing .....dancing to the song that arose from the depth of my heart.
The last one year was a horrific ordeal for me.But as the saying goes,"Every dark cloud has a silver lining".For me,St.Teresa's was the silver lining.I have regained the lost rhythm of my life and risen from the ashes of shame and defeat.Indeed,I have finally attained my Canaan of freedom!
To be or not to be:that is the quest:Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune Or,to take arms against a sea of trouble And by opposing end them?
Shakespeare's 'As you like it'
NB:I prefer the latter! I intend to be!
By:- Shalom Mary Thomas
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