GRATITUDE

GRATITUDE

“……….and as he was going into a village, ten men that were lepers came towards him; they stood far off, crying aloud, Jesus, Master, have pity on us. He met them with the words, Go and show yourselves to the priests; and there upon, as they went, they were made clean. One of them, finding that he was cured, came back, praising God aloud, and threw himself at Jesus feet with his face to the ground, to thank him… Jesus answered, were not all ten made clean? And the other nine, where are they? Not one has come back to give God the praise, except the stranger. And he said to him, Arise and go on the way, thy faith has brought the recovery”.St. Luke Ch xvII 12-19

This episode shows that even Jesus Christ, held in high esteem the virtue of gratitude. In this episode we see Jesus being elated and gratified at the thanks giving performance of the leper who returned to Jesus to show gratitude. At the same time we see Jesus annoyed of the nine ungrateful lepers. It is human to expect gratitude from those who receive help or favour from us. So also, it is quite humane to show gratitude.

Gratitude means the quality or condition of being grateful; a warm sense of appreciation of kindness received, involving a feeling of goodwill towards the benefactor and a desire to do something in return. Gratitude urges one to repay kindness. Gratitude remains empty if not accompanied by sympathy, understanding and patience in one’s dealings with others. In other words gratitude is the art of receiving gracefully, of showing appreciation for every kindness, great and small. Most of us do not fail to show our pleasure when we receive hospitality, gifts and obvious benefits, but even here we can perfect our, manner of showing gratitude by making it as personal and sincere as possible.
One fine afternoon I hired a taxi in Trivandrum. The cab-driver happened to be an old acquaintance. From the driver’s expression and the way he slammed in his gears, I could see that he was upset. I asked him what the trouble was. “I have got good reason to be sore”, he growled. “One of my fares left a handbag in my car this morning. Nearly three thousand rupees in it. I spent more than hour trying to trace the guy. Finally, I found him at his hotel. He took the handbag without a word, glared at me as though I meant to switch it”.

“He did not give you a reward”? I asked.

“Not praise and me out my time and petrol. But it was not the dough I wanted……” He fumbled, and then exploded, “If the guy had only said something….” Because his helpful, honest act had not been appreciated, that cab driver’s day was spoiled, and I knew he would think twice before rendering a similar service. The need of gratitude is something we all feel, and denial of it can do much to stifle the spirit of kindness and cooperation. Who does not loathe the ungrateful? Ingratitude may spoil and poison one’s life, may cause frustration, distress, disappointment and may serve to bring our civilization down in ruins.

May I try to reproduce here from memory, an anecdote I read somewhere in the forties, not long after the end of the Second World War. During the war a mother in America received a letter from her paratrooper son, in which he spoke of a woman in a village in Normandy who had taken him into her home when he was wounded and hungry and hid him from the Germans. Later on unhappily, the boy was killed in some offensive, yet the mother was moved by an irresistible intention. She saved up for 2 years, crossed the Atlantic and located the village referred to by her son. After exhaustive inquires, she found the woman who had sheltered her son the wife of an impoverished farmer-and pressed a package into her hand. It was the gold wrist watch her son had received on his graduation, the only object of real value the boy had ever possessed. The mother’s act of gratitude so touched people’s hearts that it has become something of a legend in and around the village.

Gratitude is sometimes more than a personal affair. A doctor friend of mine in Trivandrum Medical College, told me of a patient brought into hospital whose life was saved by a blood transfusion. When he was well again he asked. “Isn’t there any way I can discover the name of the donor and thank him?” He was told that names of donors are never divulged. A few weeks after his discharge he came back to give a pint of his own blood. Since then, he returned again and again for the same purpose. When the surgeon on duty commented on this splendid record of anonymous service, he answered simply; “ someone I never knew did it for me. I’m just saying thanks.” It is comforting thought that gratitude cannot be not merely a passing sentiment but a renewal which can, in some instances, persist for a life-time.

It is above all in the little things that the grace of gratitude should be most employed. The boy who delivers our newspaper, the milkman, the mailman, the barber, the bearer at the restaurant, the elevator operator, the bus conductor, the taxi, auto driver-all oblige us in one way or other. By showing our gratitude we make routine relationships human and render monotonous tasks more agreeable.
Nothing brightens life, our own and other’s-so much as the spirit of thanks giving. A doctor neighbor of mine narrated the following incident. One of his patients, a few weeks after his discharge from the hospital, came back to thank his nurse. “I did not come back sooner” he explained, “because I imagined you must be bored to death with people thanking you.”

“On the contrary, she replied, “I am delighted you came. Few realize how much we need encouragement and how much we are helped by those who give it.” Simple courtesy makes life easier. Manners serve to keep the foundations of society intact. The gift of gratitude enriches and benefits the life of the person who bestows it quite as much as it does the person who receives it. Gratitude is something of which none of us can give too much. For, on the smiles, the thanks we give, our neighbours build up their philosophy of life.

By: Prof. P.J Mathew,St.Alberts College